Dating Someone With Depression
In July 2018, I met the love of my life..After a year of dating around and two bad breakups, God blessed me.
I was sitting in Atlantic Station with one of my close friends, we had spent the day at a photo shoot and decided to come and hang out in the city. At this time, I had been fed up with the ridiculous escapades that I was experiencing dating. I had decided that I was done with dating and I was looking for someone serious to be a support system for life that was beginning to transition. I was about to begin my senior year of college and I knew for a fact that many things in my life were going to change! No more one night stands, or friends with benefits, I wanted someone who would catch me when I fall. Soooo during our time at Atlantic Station this what our girl talk consisted of. We got up to leave and I saw a young man with a sleeve full of tattoos and I just simply said, ” Hey! I like your tattoos!” and he responded with , ” I like the way you look”. I was shocked he was interested in me! I was nervous but with a well needed pep talk from my friend, I decided to go and introduce myself. I used to think it was cliche when people say, ” and after that it was history”, but in this story its so TRUE.
Chris and I talked everyday with such intriguing conversation about anything or everything. Then we started going on dates twice a week, and things progressed very fast. In a few of our conversations, he mentioned that sometimes he has to force himself to be happy. This stood out to me because it was a personality trait that he tried to hide often. I told him, ” i’d rather have the real you than to have someone who isn’t real”. I could tell he was afraid to open up to me, but I left myself open to any information he wanted to share. After about two months, he did share that he had a chemical imbalance and has been struggling with depression for years. Chris is 7 years older than me and this is NOT a big deal in our relationship but it was important to note what was going on in the beginning of his adulthood. He’s experienced so much trauma , and many things stuck heavy on his heart. He lost his mother, after an argument…and sadly I know that fills him with regret. He had also expressed to me that previously in his early adulthood he used to rely on percocets to make him content and better his mood. You would think these things would be red flags but I felt that it was just a part of his journey.
I chose to create this blog to create a safe place for those in relationships with someone who is depressed or if you suffer from depression how to carry on in a relationship. The hardest thing for me it just to feel like someone understands what its like to date someone like Chris and respect the time it takes to ensure an effective recovery. In my senior seminar class there were two other girls who discussed talking their boyfriends out of suicide and depression and to hear their stories it made me feel safe. Its important to note that you are never alone and the worst feeling is to think that you’re the only person going through a situation such as this.
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Dating with Depression 